Steamed Hams (5e Equipment)

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April Fools!
This content is not designed for use in regular games, and may affect overall balance and gameplay. Take caution when using this material.

Wondrous item, Legendary

This unperishable delicacy was forged and put together in the mountains that of resembling a burger, granted once consumed the consumer will not think its special as it tastes like a burger they had only a few months prior and the listed effects last for 1d20 days

No No I Said Steamed Hams Any Deception checks made to deceive a creature claiming the deceiver said something similar but not quite are granted advantage (I.E., "No I didn't say I poisoned it, I said I moistened it.")

Isometric Exercise In the event you fail a Stealth check and are caught by someone, you are able to roll Deception with advantage in an attempt to convince them that you in fact are just "Stretching your calves". On a success they will simply ignore you and go back to what they're doing. However, you may make a persuasion check to entice them to join you.

It's A Regional Dialect You may make a Deception check with advantage against a creature in an attempt to convince them that what you are doing is completely normal in your region and on a success, they will go back to whatever they're doing. (I.E "Hey what are you doing in the back of my tavern?" "Oh, it's a pedestrian checkup.. it's a regional thing.")

Aurora Borealis You may make a Deception check with advantage against a creature in an attempt to convince them that a really bright light or fire is Aurora Borealis, and they cannot enter the room on a success

I Hope You're Prepared for Unforgettable Luncheon You automatically succeed on any persuasion check on convincing a person or people to eat something you've prepared, regardless of their opinion or if they are indifferent with you. Once the meal is consumed, they believe it tasted so good that they would deem the flavor unforgettable and additionally they are charmed by you and are under the effects of the Charm Person spell for 1d4 hours.

Patented Skinner Burgers You are able to automatically succeed a deception check on someone to convince them that stolen or purchased goods are your own design and that there is NOTHING like it. Once this is done, the creature is now willing to pay triple whatever the original cost was or what you paid for it. Likewise, you and other party members cannot make any additional persuasion checks for bargaining.

Uh.. You Know, The... One Thing I Should... Excuse Me for One Second You are able to excuse yourself from any situation without being stopped. If you are in a different plane of existence, you teleport back to the material plane where you were before entering the other plane. If you are in combat, you are able to walk past or away from the enemies and they will NOT stop you.

That isn't smoke... its steam... You are able to automatically succeed on any deception check made against a creature to convince them that something that IS on fire or is burnt is either not on fire but rather steaming or that something is NOT burnt but rather steamed. This has exceptions as you cannot look a man dead in the eyes and tell him that his wife that you just burnt to a crisp with fireball, is just... "steamed."

Well Seymour, You Are an Odd Fellow, But I Must Say, You Steam a Good Ham You can complement someone's ham steaming skills and they feel better about themselves :)

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A singular steamed ham

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