Talk:Kin, Moon Presence Variant (5e Race)

This is a variant of GusOmega's Moon Presence race. https://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Moon_Presence_(5e_Race)

I created this to reorganize the text and rebalance a few features while still keeping it within the same concept.

When attempting to use Musicus' Meter[1] it turns out something like the following as many of these are not a listed feature:

• Base Kin: 4.5
  • Score +2 ; +2 ABS
  • Score +1 ; +1 ABS
  • Score +1 ; Kin of the Great Ones & Dreamborne: "Living Construct" feature
  • Score +0.5 ; Darkvision
  • Score +0 ; Nocturnal: Benefit and penalty cancel each other
  • Score +0 ; Maternal Charm: Could be a penalty but will rarely be encountered in a situation it would be considered as such.
  • Score -0.5 ; Yellow Blood: gives pursuers advantage on Survival checks to follow the Kin.
  • Score +0.5 ; Languages: One extra language

• Moon Child: +2 ; Total: 6.5
  • Score +1 ; Sharpened Bones: Natural weapon, rated a bit higher cause of its other implications besides being better than a normal unarmed replacement.
  • Score +0.5 ; Bloodlust ; "Savage Attacks" feature
  • Score +0.5 ; Dreamwalker: mostly flavor, but can be used to learn details about a person if able to visit them while they are sleeping.

• Daughter of Kos: +2 ; Total: 6.5
  • Score +1 ; Chaotic Leap: Akin to minor flight?
  • Score +1.5 ; Heart of the Sea: 30 swim speed
  • Score -0.5 ; Longing: Cancels the benefit of Nocturnal and applies disadvantage in its place.

• Daughter of Ebreitas: +1.5 ; Total: 6
  • Score -0.5 ; Weakened Legs: Reduced speed
  • Score +1.5 ; Weak Wings: 25 speed, wings, not true flying, feather fall
  • Score +0.5 ; Deceptive Fluids: Cancels out Yellow Blood

Comments

I have cleaned the quotations and lore up a bit. Checked for spelling mistakes and changed a few sentences to flow better. Good job, by the way! ConcealedLight will check over the abilities to make sure they are all in order as well, ASAP. -- ConcealedWife

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I've looked through and fixed any capitalization, italicization, and SRD references I could find. I also rewrote a couple of abilities to clarify their function.--Shiiru (talk) 08:38, 31 May 2018 (MDT)

Yeah, good job about that. I've made a few tweaks to things but for you, I'd avoid putting in anything to do with percentages as well and instead of something long and drawn out like "Any creature has advantage on Survival checks to track a Kin that is below 75% hit points. A healer's kit or a DC 15 Medicine check can be made to stop this bleeding. The DC of this check increases by 5 if the Kin is below 50% hit points and another 5 if below 25% hit points, to maximum DC of 25." it could be simplified to something like "Recovering any amount of hit points or a successful Medicine check stops this bleeding" — we're not giving a DC here because ultimately something like that should be up to the Dungeon Master for given situations. --ConcealedLight (talk) 10:15, 31 May 2018 (MDT)

Thanks for the help and I simplified that trait with your idea. --Shiiru (talk) 11:47, 31 May 2018 (MDT)